Eternal War Rising to the South: The Beynok Vampire Series by Bradshaw Erika

Author:Bradshaw, Erika [Bradshaw, Erika]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2015-09-09T22:00:00+00:00

13 – Selfless

***Sorin***

Sleep did not seem to be an option for me. I couldn’t stop thinking about how confused and upset Anya was…she had every right to be. I showed up in her world and took her away from everything she knew. Even if her world was full of lies and hidden secrets that the elders and the writers wouldn’t dare share with her, it was still her world.

She can’t possibly know what she has gotten herself into. She knows nothing about my world or how dark I am inside…what type of monster I have turned into over these past years. I’ll never truly be able to let her in; my soul is woven with hatred and hunger she’ll never understand and shouldn’t. She is a saint compared to me, even with all the killing she has done. My blood is stale and unworthy. I am a demon inside. I want to hide the truth from her but it’s her fate to live with me in this darkness. I have selfishly searched for her for years to share with her what my world has become. Now I don’t know how close I should allow her to be with me. I have dug my own grave and I don’t want to bring her with me now. I want to protect her from this war…from me, but that is not possible.

I can’t escape her…she is here…I have to make it right for her. I’ll hide my truth from her until I can’t stand it anymore. When she looks into my eyes it’s as if she sees me. She sees who I am…who I was. She might feel something for me, but she has no idea what it is. I don’t want to let her down. I tell myself everything I have done has been for her and for the leader she will be come, but it’s been for me. I can’t let her get too close to me for fear of destroying everything everyone has worked so hard to accomplish just because of the selfish demon I have become. This war we are all in and worlds that will soon collide must come first and I know that deep down.

If she is going to stay with me in my world, I can at least try to fix the gap between the world she came from and this one. I need to go talk to that bastard Vladimir. I need to see if there is any chance the Beynoks will fight with me and my side against the other supernaturals that want to reveal themselves to the human world. Maybe, if he agrees, he can talk to the elders and writers and convince the Beynoks to see the war differently. We don’t need to fight against each other if we are fighting for the same thing. I can at least feel Vladimir out on what they intend to do about Anya now that she is no longer with them. They haven’t killed me

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